While I wait for my flight: The best restaurant experience ever.

I'm currently sitting here at Kansas City International Airport in some crappy conditions waiting for a flight that has already been delayed once. While I sit here thinking about the coming weekend, I am reminded of one of the most surreal experiences I've ever had in a restaurant, which took place in the Dallas area.

To set the scene, its April 25, 2009 (only way I remember the exact date is because it was the first day of the NFL draft). I was in Dallas visiting my friends NIN (who was also in town from Seattle), Dirty GMR (not his real name) Lord Bling, and the Yard Gnome (explanation for a different time). We were hoping to get in some time at the gun range, because what says 'manly' more than a bunch of white dudes shooting handguns? 

We then decided to grab lunch at a popular hangout called 'Twin Peaks'. NOT inspired by the David Lynch TV drama, think more Hooters sans the orange shirts but in Paul Bunyan attire. Also (slightly) better food. So we all meet up there for just some time to chew the fat and make fun of each other. Lord Bling and I get there a little late and meet up with the rest of the guys, who are already seated and waiting for drinks. There is a waitress seated at the table who is just kind of chilling, and not necessarily serving. Turns out she wasn't even our server. 

Our server was a thin girl with short blonde hair, and a tattoo running up her side. She seemed to go by two names; her friends called her AJ, but she also went by the name Lillie. 'Lillie', it turned out, was to be her stage name; see this was her last weekend at Twin Peaks, she was going to go work at a gentleman's club. She also was part of a local Dallas pay website for girls who posed nude. I got not problem with that, although I wouldn't have paid a ton of money for that (don't even bother looking for the site, its now defunct). 

So over the course of the meal, Lillie would hang out with us, talk about her boyfriend who was in jail for stabbing a guy with a fork, talk about her soon to be stripping career, and constantly denying that she was going to be in porn. With each passing minute, everyone started to look at each other wondering if this was all an act to get a bigger tip, or if we were actually witnessing the slow demise of someone who we were certain was going to end up dead in a ditch in two weeks. Quite frankly, I was getting a little annoyed by her presence, and was hoping someone would come sit in her section so she would actually serve them. 

Well about an hour and a half into the experience, someone did get seated in her section. She went to go get their drinks, sat with us for 10 minutes, took their order, and then sat with us the rest of the time. A runner delivered the other party their food, they went and got their own drinks from the soda dispenser, and even left a tip (unbelievably). 

I was really taken back by Lillie's candor and openness, which we never initially broached, but as she would continue on about her sexual likes, dislikes, being from Garland, having sex for money, and not doing drugs, we kind of actually egged her on and made fun of her directly to her without her actually catching on. The climactic point of the meal is when she went out into the parking lot and did a drug deal. While working, pretty much in plain sight of everyone. As if that wasn't enough, she tried to feel up a girl who was actually applying to work for the restaurant, and was conducting her casting couch interview with the restaurant managers, which apparently includes trying on the Twin Peaks plaid top that tied in the front. This poor girl had so much trouble getting the top on around her well endowed chest, that I don't even know why it was even attempted. She was hired on the spot. 

Where is AJ now? My money is on dead. But while her young life's story was tragic and fleeting, it did teach me a very valuable lesson as a father, as I got home that weekend, and hugged my two daughters tight and vowed that they would never grow up in Garland. 

TL;DR- RIP, Lillie.